Listening to Our Thoughts & Emotions

Guided Practice: acknowledging our parts as we seek to connect to ourselves and our Source

“From the IFS point of view, the quieting of the mind associated with mindfulness happens when the parts of us usually running our lives (our egos) relax, which then allows parts we have tried to bury (exiles) to ascend, bringing with them the emotions, beliefs, and memories they carry (burdens) that got them locked away in the first place.

Most of the mindfulness approaches I'm familiar with subscribe to the mono-mind paradigm and, consequently, view such episodes as the temporary emergence of troubling thoughts and emotions rather than as hurting parts that need to be listened to and loved. Why would you want to converse with thoughts and emotions? They can't talk back, can they?

Well, it turns out that they can. In fact, they have a lot of important things to tell us.”

~ Richard Schwartz, No Bad Parts

Recently in Soul Care groups, I’ve been leading an IFS-inspired meditation to connect with ourselves and create inner space as preparation for contemplation. For those who’ve been reading my From Wounds to Wisdom newsletters, you’ve been receiving some of my gleanings from an Embody Lab Integrated Somatic Parts Work Certificate I just finished.

Reading Richard Schwartz’ book No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model, has been really helpful for me personally and a compelling integration for my work of soul care. It adds new dimensions to the work of unpacking internal narratives, spiritual direction, and returning to our soul home I’ve been leading for some time now.

Sometimes we struggle with contemplation, or so many emotions arise when we enter silence, or we want to practice ‘self-care’ and yet don’t. As we create space for prayer, meditation, or contemplation, and desire to connect with the Source within us, we can listen to our various parts, our thoughts and emotions.

“Our parts can sometimes be disruptive or harmful, but once they’re unburdened, they return to their essential goodness. When we learn to love all our parts, we can learn to love all people―and that will contribute to healing the world.” ~ Dr. Schwartz

By unburdening our parts we create space within us for our Core Self to lead and connect to what IFS calls the Big Self. I love that. I love that there is a sense of the Divine in this therapeutic modality. Richard Schwartz shares how he grew up in agnostic home and it was in offering parts work therapy that he witnessed so many people connecting with a larger Source. He came to believe there is more than our selves at work, there is a Big Self. A Source of Love that we can connect to when we create space and slow down but is always there.

It is not all up to us in this work of healing.

Instead of powering through, how would it feel to slow down, and offer some compassion to where you are at right now, to your various parts. Below is a guided practice adapted from Richard Schwartz’s book No Bad Parts, if you’d rather listen to a meditation there are a few below.

Doing this work doesn’t mean we don’t still get triggered, but we are more aware, equipped, and hopefully experience more freedom to make decisions, regulate our emotions, and return to a grounded state.

We are freer from the burdens we carry to see our True Self and connect with the Source within us.

Photo by Pavitra Baxi on Unsplash